Cranky Actress Blog

Had a callback yesterday for a film. The director was having me read with an actress who is already cast. You could tell she was already cast, as she felt no need to impress anyone and was 20 minutes late.

We go into the room where we’re going to film the audition and she sits down and she is wearing a kinda huge, loud plaid hat pulled down over her eyebrows. I’m going to be reading an emotional scene where my son is in a coma and I’m not feeling the hat.   Who wears a hat at an audition? The hat had nothing to do with her character or the scene. THE HAT WAS TAKING OVER. I ask; “Ah, um, would you possibly, ah, would it be ok if you took off the hat?” “NO”, she says and looks uncomfortable. Ok, so I’ll do the scene with the hat. “I’d just like to see your face.” I say. “Oh” she says and pushes it up above her eyebrows. Then she says; “I’m not emotionally prepared or anything. I mean I’m not ready to really do the scene. I don’t think I’m going to be able to give you anything.”

Did she just fall in here unsuspecting off the sidewalk? Did she not know she was coming? I tell her, “Just relax and be natural and don’t push, it’s OK.” Even when people are obnoxious you have to help them because otherwise it will screw you up.

After we read, we are and walking out together I ask her if she is having a bad hair day.   For the first time she becomes animated and says; “YES! I got up today and just decided fuck it, and I didn’t wash my hair. THAT’S WHY I’M WEARING THE HAT!” I tell her I did the same thing because it’s raining. Washing your hair on a rainy day and going to a film audition is artistic suicide. Guaranteed big frizzy hair – bad on camera. “I flat ironed dirty hair before I came here” I say. “YOU DID?” She says with an amazed AH-HAH look on her face like that is the most ingenious thing she’s ever heard. I think I just saved the next person she will audition with from THE HAT.